Nikki Carter is a writer and editor. She writes a monthly newsletter, Will & Way, for women of color creatives and techies. She also makes and sells wall hangings on Etsy.
This blog post is part of a new series stemming from our ‘Does This Feel Good?’ post.
What do you find pleasure in?
I actually have a long list on my phone of all the things that bring me pleasure! Here are some: freedom, the ability to create my own schedule, helping other people when I have the bandwidth to do so, giving back, cuddling, decaf tea + creamer, oatmilk chais, novelty, sobriety, r&b music, glitter, disco balls, marching bands, my cat, meditation, soft serve ice cream with sprinkles, religious art, nachos, the ocean, mountains.
What does your ideal pleasurable life look like?
Living in a city I love, being part of communities I care about, enough money to take care of myself and others, spending time in nature, exploring new destinations, having time to read and write, having a cozy home space I can recharge in, being in a partnership that’s supportive and reciprocal, feeling emotionally secure and mentally balanced.
What forms of media bring you comfort and why?
Podcasts (I love The Read; it always makes me laugh); music (particularly old playlists I’ve made, as I find the volume of new music out there overwhelming). I like different kinds of media at different times; for example, I loved going to the theater and watching The Batman recently, but I don’t like going to the movies all of the time. I think I enjoy novelty and variety, so experimenting with different forms of media at various times is good for me.
A pleasurable activity you wish you could make more time for:
Honestly, I think I do a pretty good job of making time for things I want to do. I’ve kind of built my life around being able to do what I want. I will say that I went back to school last fall and was super busy and everything else had to take a backseat, and I really missed being able to read for leisure.
In what ways have you centered pleasure and your own comfort in life?
I kind of just touched on this, but I’ve also worked to advocate for my own work-life balance and freedom. I negotiated alternative work arrangements when I was still working in the corporate world and eventually made the jump to full-time freelancing so that I only have to answer to myself. I also try to schedule in things I know are good for me, like a monthly massage, regular workouts, stuff like that.
